Nine inch nails - Hurt

I hurt myself today
to see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
the only thing that's real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but I remember everything
what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
I wear this crown of shit
on my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
beneath the stain of time
the feelings disappear
you are someone else
I am still right here
what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
if I could start again
a million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way

so i havent posted in a few days, heres a wrap up of life for anyone who may read this.
thursday - messed up my left arm badly. like really badly
friday - heathers birthday. went great she had a good time, saw kung fu panda and hung out with her friends
tuesday - heather decided she doesnt want to be with me right now. she feels like her life has fallen apart. she refuses to talk to me and wants nothing to do with me. my own wife has decided that not im nothing but ruin.
wednesday - today i sat on the floor or the world like a 2 year old with no purpose, i have nothing that makes me smile now. i was left in search of finding god again and now i feel like he has abandoned me. its become very hard for me in just these past 24 hours, i cant function on my own with my injuries, i cant button my own pants or one of my shirts, i cant rip up lettuce to feed the lizard. i cant tie shoes, i can barely drive. im left with putting and ice pack on my warm, popping more pain pills and waiting till i have to goto work. i luckily am blessed with the fact that i have always typed with only my right hand. so that i may record my pain on the internet i guess. scribbled down in http so that one day someone may look and see what i was thinking. life has become worthless. this earth has no need for me anymore.
honeslty pray i see tomorrow, if work sucks tonight i quit.